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.I didn't find theanswer in a night of fitful sleep and frighteningly real wet nightmares.WednesdayI woke up and true to her word, Isabella was not there to take advantageof me. I was disappointed that I wouldn't be able to use grogginess ordrunkenness to justify getting a load of her cum in one of my hungryholes. I felt my cock twitching ready and eager to play and my assholeitching deep inside where only a cock could scratch it. I thought for amoment about trying to find my gee that feels good spot with my fingersand having a nice morning wank to pick up my spirits, but then Irealized I'd only feel worse afterward. I had to do something to breakout of this pattern of fruitless attempts to be the ultimate man andsurrendering to the sissy splendor of forbidden fruits.If trying to be a man like my step-father made me feel weak and givinginto being a sissy because it seemed easier made me feel guilty, maybe Iwasn't either, and maybe I didn't have to be. I made a different vowthat day. I. No. A lot of it was the sex. That kind of symbolized the complete renovation of the way we thought about each other and the world.“We agreed to keep each other, keep the house, and to keep our jobs. Other than that we threw literally everything else about our lives in the air to see what came down and in what pattern. Every principle or value we were raised to abide and our wedding vows got tossed out or rewritten in some way. While all that was going on, we started to have sex with other people. Sex, for us, was a big deal, and it still is. I often correct people and say we ‘make love’ instead of fuck or have sex, but at some level it was all the same.“Moreover, we couldn’t get enough of it. We’d been VERY regimented and almost chaste in our sex lives. Once or twice a week, on schedule, at best, was the rule, but our church was beating into us that sex was ultimately a bad thing.“Well, we quickly learned that we LOVED sex. We went from zero to sixty miles per hour in our sex lives.
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